I live with a Stay at Home Mom

3 Jun

I expected that when Zac began working full-time things would change for us. For example, I figured I’d have to start cooking dinner sometimes, since I’m no longer the last one home. This is true.

I figured I’d have to be the one to load the dishwasher and clean up the kitchen on my lunch hour, since I’m the only one home for lunch now. This is true.

(Trust me when I say I do not mind either of those things!)

I figured we would become morning people…the kind who wake up without an alarm clock, share eggs and toast and banter over the morning paper. Fail. We don’t even get a morning paper.

What I didn’t figure was how else things would change when Zac went from splitting his time between classes, an internship and 2 jobs – a schedule that kept him surrounded by adults all day – to going to work at a pediatric clinic. Pediatric is the key word here. Pediatric. Kiddos. Beebees. Rugrats. Little people. All the live long day.

So without further ado, ways our lives have changed:

1. When I sneeze and or sniffle Zac says, “Do you need a Kleenex?” I say, “No, thanks though.” Zac says, “Are you sure? I’ve got a Kleenex riiiiight here!”

2. When the rainy weather requires a light jacket, Zac holds it open for me. At first I thought this was chivalry, then I saw him reach for the zipper.

3. When I bake or cook something new and delicious Zac exclaims “Good job, Buddy!!”

4. When I intentionally talk silly, for example “Are we home yet? Cus I gots tah pee!” Zac doesn’t miss a beat with his reply…”You have to pee.”

5. My husband, the one you probably think leans more toward the quiet side than the chatty side, can and will talk 100 mph without breathing for extended periods of time. Then he will sigh loudly and say, “Sorry. I haven’t talked to an adult all day.”

So it’s clear. While the changes I expected to see have in fact changed there was one change I didn’t anticipate. It would appear that I now live with a stay at home mom.

These are things I noticed last week, laughed about to myself, teased Zac about. But it wasn’t until this past Monday that I realized something. It’s not just him…

While paying our bill at a Mexican restaurant I snagged one of those starlite mints from the bowl. I looked up at Zac and he was tapping his hands together to Baby Sign “more.” I thought “For crying out load now we baby sign to each other.”

But I’m a good wife and I grabbed like 10 more mints and put them in my purse. Again, he Baby Signs “more”. Again, I pile them into my purse. About the third time this happens, Zac’s eyes are wide, looking at me like I’m the crazy one because I’m signing “all gone!” We stepped out of the restaurant and I said, “How many freakin’ mints do you need??”

“What????” He says. “Why were you taking so many??”

“You kept Baby Signing ‘more.’ I thought you wanted more mints!”

“Noooo! I wanted you to look at the cashier’s finger nails. She had really crazy looking finger nails.”

Alas, its not just Zac. His new job has made us both crazy.

I’ve also learned that it is not possible for only one person in a marriage to learn sign language – baby or otherwise. (Although I think he told me they are actually the same signs…but I was too focused on trying to teach my parent’s dog the sign for “No” at the time so I don’t recall.)

Heaven help us when we learn the swear words.

Yeah, you’re right, I already know those.

It’s all good though, my job has rubbed off on him too. Driving home Memorial Day weekend, before I could even comment Zac said, “Look at the light on that field! Can you believe the light is that warm this early in the evening?!”

I said, “Good job, Buddy!!”

Blog disclaimers:
I exaggerate everything. Except the part about the mints. Let me know if you need one.
I support Stay at Home Moms. I am not making fun of them.


3 Responses to “I live with a Stay at Home Mom”

  1. Erica June 4, 2010 at 1:46 pm #

    Thank you Maggie, for the much-needed comic relief during my workday:) Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to explain to my coworkers why I snorted and laughed:)

  2. Molly June 4, 2010 at 9:50 pm #


  3. Rebecca June 9, 2010 at 7:54 pm #

    Maggie– I seriously laughed so hard my stomach hurt! 🙂 LOL. I LOVED the Mexican restaraunt story–so funny!! Well, really, it all was. Thanks for the laugh!!!

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